Dinner at my grandmas or thoughts on food culture

For as long as I can remember my job at large family dinners was to put ice cubes in all the cups. My grandmother would pull the ice bucket from her ice machine out of the freezer and hand me a large measuring cup to scoop with; I would make my way around the table carefully making sure all the glasses had the same amount of ice cubes. As my brothers and sisters got older they would help with the ice and I got upgraded to table setting duty because I knew which side of the plate to put the spoons and knives.

These days I'm generally on kitchen duty at my grandmothers during holidays and family meals, helping her make gravy, juggle dishes as they come in and out of the oven, troubleshoot disasters, and plate dishes. I work next to aunts, uncles, parents, and siblings as my grandma runs around, directing traffic and trying to help with everything at the same time. After dinner we sit at the counter and grandma hands us dishes to dry as she washes them.

While the dinner is always excellent and the conversation good, I have found that the time we spend as a family in preparation of a meal together is just as rewarding, if not more so, than the actual meal.

For my family, during the holidays, food is not just another thing we have to get done in the Christmas rush, or a menial household task that must be completed to move on to what we really want to do. Food surrounds, encased, and is intertwined with our family get-togethers. Much of my best quality time is spend in the kitchen next to a family member I have not seen in months, becoming reacquainted as we peel vegetables, butter garlic bread, and skewer meat for the grill. Meaningful conversation seems to blossom when you work side by side.

While I was lucky to be raised within a somewhat healthy food culture in general American food culture is non-existent. Rather than eating to nurture relationships, enjoy others company, and appreciate our food, Americans generally eat to survive, and do so according to the principles of cheapness and convenience. We often eat alone, often while doing something else like driving or reading. Cooking is becoming a lost art and is viewed as a distasteful chore helped along by corporate America, which has used feminism to support the notion that emancipated women do not cook, but buy convenience food to feed their families.

The American relationship with food is in direct contrast to the Italians and the French, two peoples who eat some of the best food in the world. These people tend to eat socially, to enjoy their food, and they learn to cook. They value food, not only because they have to eat it to survive, but as part of their cultural heritage, and as a driving factor in their social relationships and family life. They spend time preparing the food and their meals are considerable longer- they are social occasions rather than fill-up stops.

 One of the most interesting things about these people is that they are much healthier than we are. One would think people who value and enjoy food would be suffering from an obesity epidemic and a people who is always suspicious of food, eats quickly, and is consistently dieting would be thin and healthy. The opposite is actually true. These people have created healthy relationships in regards to food-- relationships which have also influenced their health. It seems that our American epidemic is not only an issue of what we eat, but when, where, how long, and with whom we are eating.


What are your thoughts about food culture? Memories of your family and food? I'd love to hear it.